On Saturday, I received two things in the mail. One was a check with even MORE insurance money (Hey Lisa, wanna hang out?). The other was an official notice of a WARRANT FOR MY ARREST
omg omg omg
Naturally I was confused as to what the warrant was for, because I commit SO much crime all the time (see our Oct 22 blog entry). After much legal counsel (ie: drinking at an ICP show with Grant) I discovered that the warrant was issued because I forgot a court date for (here's where the comedy comes in) pissing in public. LOLOLOLOLOL ($2,500 bail)
Needless to say, my father is proud of me. I'd also like to take this time to point out that HotDamnTV is having a contest! Send a picture, paragraph, or video to email@example.com describing why you're good at sex. One lucky winner will be allowed to give me conjugal visits when I'm on the inside!
Pic related, it's me holding a suppressed MP5 and a warrant for my own arrest.