Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Twofer Tuesday

Tis the season droogs. Serious things are afoot, climate change might be happening, I think North Korea is trying to start some shit, and that bad bad motherfucker they call Sandy Claws is preparing to scuttle about in the dark and chop the toes off your footsies if they're hanging over the edge of that bed. And believe you me sister, ain't a damn thing gonna stop that B&E+Home Invasion/rape. The one thing that can slow Sandy Claws down (not stop mind you, he's more unflappable than the golly darned boogie man in this respect) is Christmas Carols, or strange christmassy related music from the internets!

Holy shit. This vidya is incredible. Move over Rihanna (who would've thought you'd get more hits after umbrella? Chris Brown, that's who. El oh el striking women) and/or Feminem there are some new kids in the cul de sac. This video is primarily about a bunch of god damned furries who have been waiting to yiff specifically when Frosty the Snowman may be lurking in the fields (with a battle axe). This video has all of the classiest elements of video editing: overuse of obvious greenscreening, gradients, ~LENSFLARES OUT OF FUCKING NOWHERE~, and more stock/tutorial video editing effects than an intro to After Effects class. Also get a load of that red furry's horseface. Wasn't this broad on Sex In The City? If you don't think they're legit, ask they're heroin dealer/pimp Cowboy Craig (on right) aka the creepiest dude in the kiddy programming game since Captain Kangaroo (just kidding big guy, we love ya).

This is quite possibly the most touching song about shoes since Nelly dropped that club banger "Air Force Ones" ft. About Twenty Other Afro-American Fellas. That was my jam. I'm not sure what the Negro of the Opera is doing in this video (see right), but maybe Spike Jonez is preparing to remake that classic musical into some kind of joint. That's what he does. Have we talked about how great Lil Bow Wow's movie about winning the lottery is? I've got a subscription to Jet Magazine. My next door neighbor is black and my room mate is half black so I'm well qualified to talk about these topics. Where were we again? Oh yea, the shoes. I'll take two purrs of the urr furce ones. The only question I had after watching the video was: what was up with all those fellas standing around in the background behind the singer? If they were the band they had a serious instrument shortage. If they were backup dancers then they must charge by the move, since they did not shake a single tail feather. Full on double X-mas, all the way across the internets.

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